06:49:26 AM 10/08/07

Kidnapped ... and taken to the bank!

It was close to 4am on a Thursday night. I chose Thursday night because I knew there would still be a ton of action going on in the Zona Norte, but maybe not as crazy as Friday or Saturday night since I was driving in this time.

I decided to dig a little deeper and push it more than usual...I think I had begun to feel a little over-confident. Anyway, I headed south ... deeper into the Zona Norte than ever before where no tourists ever go. I had a good feeling and was not afraid. How wrong I was...

At this point, I was probably 8 blocks or so "southish" of the world famous Adelita bar. Quite frankly, I wasn't exactly sure what I was looking for ... I was just sort of "missioning" real quickly through this area which turned out to be an absolute ghost town.

I was beginning to get impatient and decided to head back towards the tourist zone which at this point was north-east about 6 blocks or so. I made a random left turn up this street and came upon 2 guys standing in the road to the right side. I pulled up along side them and rolled down the window to ask them a question to which they replied "Que?" over and over which translated means "What?" ... From here I took a chance and made a big mistake.

I decided to get out of my car (which for clarification's sake is a very nice, expensive car) so they could hear me ... I know ... RISKY!! That's what you call "asking for it." More on "asking for it" later but for now ... just know that I'm fluent in Spanish and knew where I was for the most part and had a lot of experience in Mexico by now ...

So I get out of the car to talk to these two guys who looked cool at first but who quickly approached me ... pick-pocketed me immediately and took my cell phone. I tried to take it back from this guy who was smaller than me ... but then realized his big friend who literally had a trench coat on was ready for "business" ... And I couldn't tell if he had a gun or not but he kinda looked familiar like someone I had seen posing as a cop before. So I immediately cooperated at which point they forced me into my car ... and told me to drive to the bank ...

I realized in this moment that I was in some serious trouble and that all those stories I had heard about over the years of things that happen to Americans sometimes in foreign countries all came rushing back to my mind as my mind began to race ... Was this my fate?? My Dad and I had already survived a mugging by 5 guys in Rio de Janiero years prior and for a split second before I got in the car, I thought maybe I should just take off, bail the car ... and live to explain it all later. My problem however is that I'm a bit of a risk taker and don't like to give up that easily ... I know ... STOOPID!! But seriously, if it was anywhere else where I didn't know where I was and didn't think I had a chance ... I would have thrown the keys one way ... and ran the other!

I don't know what came over me next but I just basically totally relaxed, got in the car ... and just started talking to these guys like they were my friends and I already knew them and just basically said "No problema ... vamos al banco" ... "No problem ... we're off to the bank." I think at first they were just as stunned as I was that this whole thing was going down ... and were probably wondering who in the hell this gringo was down here who spoke perfect Spanish and driving this car. Anyway ... the guy with the trench coat was sitting in the back seat and I still couldn't tell if he had a gun or not ... but again, I had a little more control over the situation than they realized ...

Again ... I had a pretty good idea where I was but my first thought was that if I discovered the guy in the back seat had a gun ... I was just going to drive the car into a wall and bail out! The cops would show ... I'd go to jail big time but be alive. Second thought however was I thought I'd sort of work my way towards the police station and pretend like I knew where a bank was and not ask them which bank cause doing so would have only put them in the "Driver's seat." ... And I didn't want to do that and give up any of what control I still had. Now the police station is located between the tourist zone and the Zona Norte under the big Mexican flag...and I preyed I'd see a cop there or at least be able to bail out close enough to the police station to get my car back ... (I know ... **** the car!)

Anyway ... I continued to drive and calmly talk to these guys never acting nervous or scared ... just like we were friends. And as all these thoughts however of how I was going to get out of this continued racing through my mind ... I was preying and preying I'd see a cop car or SOMETHING! But it was dead out and I was getting desperate! But sure enough ... lucky me and as The Universe would have it ... I rounded a corner and came upon 2 cop cars with a guy pulled over ... WHAT A MIRACLE!

I knew right then and right there that this was IT ... PERIOD!! I immediately thought "Prayers answered ... now's you're chance ... go for it!" ... I knew that if I chickened out and took a chance the guy in the back seat had a gun ... I might never get away and end up buried in a hole in the Mexican desert. Besides if he pulled a gun ... I could still bail out, maybe take a shot but hopefully still live. I mean how good a shot is this guy? By the way ... if you talk with any law enforcement officers or security professionals, they'll all tell you NEVER GET INTO THE CAR AND GO TO THE SECONDARY CRIME SCENE ... EVER!! ... Which is exactly what I did and the calculated risk I took. However, statistics show that most of the time you'll wind up dead if you go to the SECONDARY CRIME SCENE ... So don't EVER do what I did ...RUN! ...

So anyway ... they quickly realized what I was up to and began to panic! The guy in the back seat did NOT pull a gun and for that matter neither of them tried to pull a weapon at this point so I knew I was "home free!" I quickly sped up, pulled up along side the 2 cop cars real quickly ... incidentally, the guys in the car with me at this point were yelling "por favor, por favor" (no joke) ... and I threw it in park and dove out of the car right into the middle of the street in front of 4 Mexican police officers! ... Pitch black out!

First thought ... "No way ... I escaped" ... Second thought ... "Oh s**t ... 4 Mexican police officers on a dark street at 4am with assault rifles, and here's some crazy gringo diving out of a $85,000 vehicle waving his arms around"... Once again ... thank God I knew Spanish ...

The startled but very professional Mexican authorities quickly approached me and asked me what in the hell was going on while another one approached my vehicle. I was both relieved and s***ing a cow at the same time. The Mexican authorities are all fluent in English however so they spoke to me in English and began to question me. Fortunately again for me, it looked like they already had a couple thugs pulled over and were busy...

The one cop in particular who was talking to me the most I gathered began to realize what was going on and sort of went easy on me. The other cops got the other 2 guys out of my car and put them in the back of their police car and then did the standard search throughout my vehicle to which they found nothing of course. As the cop continued to question me asking me what was going on ... if you can believe it ... I finally made up this story that I was lost after leaving Adelitas and that these two guys were just trying to help me find the border ... AND I LET THE TWO GUYS GO!!

WHY?? ... I don't know. I really feel that I was STOOPID in the first place for driving in that particular area in my nice car ... AND BASICALLY FOR ASKING FOR IT!! I knew better than that and was really mad at myself for being so dumb and realized once again HOW EXTREMELY LUCKY I WAS ... and quite frankly ... I just wanted to get the hell out of there and get to the U.S. ... and PRONTO!! Besides ... these 2 albeit thugs didn't premeditate this thing with me, they had no weapons ... and it was obvious the cops had dealt with these guys before so what was the difference??

I left it to the Universe and headed for "La Linea." Upon crossing the border ... it went like this:

Agent: "Driver's license, purpose for visiting Mexico?"

Me: "Dinner and a few clubs"

Agent: "How long were you in Mexico?"

Me: "Eight hours or so"

Agent: "Bringing anything back?"

Me: "No not today"

Agent: "Well'd you have a good time?" (highly unusual question!)

Me: "Sure did" (a little stunned)

Agent: "Have a good night"

Me: "I will you too"